Destiny's Irony: How We Try to Dodge It and Still End Up in Its Grip

Destiny’s Irony: How We Try to Dodge It and Still End Up in Its Grip

By: John S Morlu II, CPA

“Sometimes, a man meets his destiny on the very road he takes to avoid it.” This timeless observation, tinged with irony and laced with a subtle dark humor, has captivated the minds of thinkers, philosophers, and everyday individuals alike. It speaks to a universal truth about the human experience: the more we strive to outmaneuver fate, the more it seems to tighten its grip, guiding us inexorably toward the very outcomes we sought to escape.

At its core, this paradox reveals the intricate dance between our aspirations and the often unpredictable nature of life. We are driven by an innate desire to control our paths, to carve out a future that aligns with our hopes and dreams. We make plans, set goals, and take deliberate steps to avoid pitfalls and detours. Yet, despite our best efforts, life has a way of surprising us—of steering us in directions we never intended to go.

The phrase captures the essence of this struggle: the absurdity of human existence lies not in our attempts to shape our destiny, but in the realization that destiny might already be shaping us. We like to believe that we are the masters of our fate, architects of our future. But as we navigate the complexities of life, we often find ourselves circling back to the very places we were trying to avoid, as if drawn by some unseen force.

This idea resonates deeply because it challenges the notion of absolute control—a comforting illusion we cling to in a world that is often chaotic and uncertain. It suggests that, no matter how meticulously we plan or how carefully we tread, there are elements of our journey that remain beyond our influence. It’s a humbling realization, one that forces us to confront the limits of our power and the inevitability of certain outcomes.

Yet, within this paradox lies a profound insight: perhaps the paths we seek to avoid are not obstacles, but necessary steps in our growth and development. The roads we fear may hold the very lessons we need to learn, the experiences that shape us into who we are meant to become. Destiny, in this sense, is not a predetermined end but a series of encounters and choices that refine us along the way.

In this light, the phrase becomes more than a commentary on the futility of resisting fate; it transforms into a powerful reminder to embrace the unexpected, to find meaning in the twists and turns of our journey. Rather than seeing destiny as a rigid script we must follow, we can view it as a dynamic process—one that we engage with, adapt to, and ultimately learn from.

By accepting that we may meet our destiny on the very roads we try to avoid, we open ourselves up to the full spectrum of life’s experiences. We become more resilient in the face of challenges, more open to change, and more willing to let go of the need for total control. In doing so, we find a deeper sense of purpose, a greater appreciation for the journey, and the wisdom to recognize that sometimes, the detours we fear are the ones that lead us exactly where we need to be.

The Greek Tragedy of Trying Too Hard

Let’s start with ancient Greek mythology because nothing says “you’re doomed no matter what you do” quite like the Greeks. Take the tale of Oedipus, the original unfortunate soul who tried to duck fate. A prophecy foretold that he would kill his father and marry his mother. Sensibly horrified, his parents abandoned him, and Oedipus, not knowing his true identity, grew up thinking he could outwit this nasty piece of destiny. Fast forward a few years, and not only does he kill his real father in a case of mistaken identity, but he also marries his mother. It’s almost as if the gods were laughing, saying, “Nice try, Oedipus, but fate’s got your number.”

This story isn’t just ancient history; it’s a pattern we see over and over. Fast forward a couple of millennia, and we find examples in modern politics. Take Richard Nixon, for instance, a man so obsessed with avoiding scandal that he essentially dug his own political grave. Here was a president who, in trying to avoid any whiff of controversy, orchestrated the Watergate cover-up, which ultimately led to his resignation. In attempting to sidestep a minor political bruise, Nixon ended up with a self-inflicted wound that bled out his entire presidency. The moral? Sometimes, the cover-up is worse than the crime, and destiny has a way of making sure you learn that the hard way.

Avoiding Risk, Courting Disaster

The financial world is a treasure trove of destiny-related irony. Remember the 2008 financial crisis? It was a time when banks, terrified of losing out on profits, created complex financial instruments to avoid the perceived risk of lending money to people who couldn’t pay it back. What they ended up doing, of course, was creating a system so convoluted and fragile that it collapsed under its own weight, taking the global economy with it. In their desperate attempt to avoid the risk of financial loss, they triggered the very disaster they sought to prevent.

The irony isn’t lost on anyone who’s ever made a financial decision. Consider the average person who avoids the stock market because they fear losing money. Instead, they put their savings into something “safe” like a low-interest savings account, only to find that inflation erodes their purchasing power over time. In trying to avoid the risk of loss, they guarantee a different kind of loss—one that’s slower, less dramatic, but just as real.

The Health Kick That Kicked Back

In the realm of personal health, the road to destiny is often paved with kale smoothies and gym memberships. Take, for example, the person who becomes obsessed with living a long and healthy life. They avoid red meat, sugar, gluten, and anything that might contain more than 0.5% of fun. Their diet is a rigid, joyless affair, but hey, it’s all in the name of outsmarting destiny, right?

Enter the paradox. Numerous studies have shown that extreme dietary restrictions can lead to various health problems, including nutritional deficiencies and an increased risk of mental health issues like anxiety and depression. In their quest to avoid the dangers of an unhealthy lifestyle, these health fanatics sometimes find themselves in the doctor’s office for entirely different reasons. Destiny, it seems, has a way of making sure that those who try to avoid one set of problems often find themselves entangled in another.

Then there’s the infamous example of jogging enthusiast Jim Fixx, author of “The Complete Book of Running,” who helped popularize running as a path to good health and longevity. Tragically, Fixx died of a heart attack at the age of 52 while out on a run. While his death doesn’t negate the benefits of exercise, it serves as a grim reminder that even the most health-conscious among us can’t completely escape their fate. Sometimes, the road to a longer life leads straight to an early grave.

The Workaholic’s Dilemma

In the world of work, the irony of destiny plays out in countless ways. Consider the workaholic who spends every waking hour at the office, driven by the fear of failure. They believe that by working harder than anyone else, they can avoid the fate of professional irrelevance. But in their relentless pursuit of success, they often sacrifice their health, relationships, and personal happiness. The result? They might achieve professional success, but at what cost? Burnout, health issues, and estranged relationships are the inevitable companions of this kind of single-minded dedication. Destiny, it seems, ensures that in trying to avoid one type of failure, they stumble into another.

Steve Jobs, the iconic Apple co-founder, was known for his intense work ethic and perfectionism. He pushed himself and his employees to their limits, often at the expense of personal well-being. Jobs’ drive led to the creation of revolutionary products and a company culture that celebrated relentless innovation. However, this same drive may have contributed to his premature death from pancreatic cancer at the age of 56. While Jobs’ achievements are undeniably remarkable, his story also serves as a reminder that even those who reach the pinnacle of success are not immune to the whims of destiny.

The Social Media Spiral

In today’s digital age, avoiding destiny has taken on new forms. Social media, for example, offers a platform for people to craft and curate their lives, presenting only the most polished, idealized versions of themselves. Many people use social media to avoid the messiness of real life, attempting to project an image of perfection. Yet, studies have shown that excessive social media use can lead to increased feelings of loneliness, anxiety, and depression. The very tool people use to avoid feeling inadequate or disconnected often exacerbates those exact feelings.

Take the case of Instagram influencers, who build their brands around a carefully constructed image of success, happiness, and perfection. Behind the scenes, many of these influencers struggle with the pressure to maintain this façade, leading to burnout, mental health issues, and in some cases, public breakdowns. The road they took to avoid feeling ordinary or unsuccessful often leads them straight into the arms of the very insecurities they sought to escape.

The Environmental Conundrum

Even on a global scale, humanity’s efforts to avoid one kind of destiny can lead to another, often more disastrous, outcome. Consider the widespread use of fossil fuels. For centuries, societies have relied on coal, oil, and natural gas to fuel economic growth and improve living standards. The desire to avoid the hardships of pre-industrial life—poverty, hunger, and disease—drove the widespread adoption of these energy sources. However, in doing so, we’ve created a new destiny for ourselves: climate change.

The irony here is thick. The very technologies that were supposed to deliver humanity from the harsh realities of nature are now threatening to make the planet uninhabitable. Rising sea levels, extreme weather events, and the loss of biodiversity are just a few of the consequences we now face. In trying to avoid the hardships of the past, we’ve engineered a future that could be even more challenging.

The Moral of the Story: Embrace the Paradox

So, what’s the takeaway from all these tales of irony and unintended consequences? Perhaps it’s this: destiny has a sense of humor, and it’s often at our expense. The more we try to outmaneuver it, the more likely we are to find ourselves in its grasp. This isn’t to say that we should throw up our hands in despair and stop trying to make wise choices. Rather, it’s a reminder to approach life with a sense of humility and an understanding that not everything is within our control.

In a world obsessed with control—where we track our steps, count our calories, and plan our careers down to the last detail—it’s both sobering and liberating to recognize that some things are simply out of our hands. Trying to micromanage every aspect of our lives in the hopes of avoiding an unpleasant fate might just be the very thing that leads us to it.
Instead, perhaps the wiser course is to embrace the uncertainty of life. Accept that some things will happen no matter what, and that’s okay. By letting go of the illusion of control, we might find ourselves less stressed, more adaptable, and better able to enjoy the journey, no matter where it leads. After all, if destiny is going to have the last laugh, we might as well laugh along with it.

In the end, life’s unpredictability is what makes it interesting. The roads we take—whether to avoid disaster, seek success, or simply find our way—are full of unexpected turns, surprises, and yes, a fair share of irony. And that’s what makes the journey worthwhile. Destiny, it seems, is less a final destination and more a traveling companion, one that delights in reminding us that sometimes, the best-laid plans lead us exactly where we were meant to go all along.

Embracing the Inevitable: The Power of Accepting Life’s Ironies

In the end, the profound truth of “Sometimes, a man meets his destiny on the very road he takes to avoid it” underscores a fundamental aspect of our human experience: the futility of trying to completely control our destinies. Despite our best efforts to navigate around obstacles and avoid the unexpected, life has a way of leading us straight into the heart of the very challenges we sought to evade.

This realization can be both humbling and empowering. It reminds us that, while we may not always have the power to dictate the outcomes of our endeavors, we do have the ability to shape our responses and attitudes. By embracing the irony that life’s detours often bring us to our true destinies, we open ourselves up to deeper growth and understanding.

Instead of resisting or fearing the unexpected, we can learn to view it as an integral part of our journey. These unplanned paths are often the ones that teach us the most, offering insights and experiences that refine our character and enrich our lives. Accepting that destiny often finds us on roads we tried to avoid allows us to approach life with greater resilience and openness.

Ultimately, the power lies not in our ability to control every outcome, but in our capacity to navigate life’s twists with grace and adaptability. By letting go of the illusion of absolute control and embracing the inherent unpredictability of our paths, we find a more profound sense of purpose and fulfillment. In recognizing that our true destinies may lie precisely where we least expect them, we discover the strength to face the unexpected with courage and embrace the journey with a renewed sense of wonder.

Author: John S. Morlu II, CPA is the CEO and Chief Strategist of JS Morlu, leads a globally recognized public accounting and management consultancy firm. Under his visionary leadership, JS Morlu has become a pioneer in developing cutting-edge technologies across B2B, B2C, P2P, and B2G verticals. The firm’s groundbreaking innovations include AI-powered reconciliation software (ReckSoft.com) and advanced cloud accounting solutions (FinovatePro.com), setting new industry standards for efficiency, accuracy, and technological excellence.

JS Morlu LLC is a top-tier accounting firm based in Woodbridge, Virginia, with a team of highly experienced and qualified CPAs and business advisors. We are dedicated to providing comprehensive accounting, tax, and business advisory services to clients throughout the Washington, D.C. Metro Area and the surrounding regions. With over a decade of experience, we have cultivated a deep understanding of our clients’ needs and aspirations. We recognize that our clients seek more than just value-added accounting services; they seek a trusted partner who can guide them towards achieving their business goals and personal financial well-being.
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